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Opinion: What’s your new year’s resolution?

A humourous look at the top 10 new year's resolutions.
new-years-getty
New year's resolutions are not a reason to celebrate.

The new year is quickly approaching and along with that, thousands of people will make new year’s resolutions.

Here are my thoughts on the top 10 resolutions, according to my Google search. Only 75 per cent will last one week, 71 per cent two weeks, and after one month, that percentage goes down to 64. Six months down the road only 46 per cent will still hold fast to their new year’s resolutions.

Here it goes, the No. 1 resolution is exercise. I am safe with this one, although winter slows me down some. I am fairly sure house cleaning should count, as should walking to my truck. If they are talking about driving to the gym and working out, I would fail.

Losing weight is second. I aced this one. I am ahead of the game as I have lost 12 pounds in five weeks. I ate soup, yogurt and some ice cream. I should mention that I had all my teeth pulled and have to get used to dentures. Even so, I mastered it, but I will tell you, once I get the hang of these things, the chip bag and the Christmas chocolates will come out once again, so I guess I would fail.

The third is getting organized. I have this one hands down. I have a pile of stuff here and a pile of stuff there, and I know exactly what is in each pile. Nobody should mess with those piles, as then I would be unorganized, and I would fail at this one too. My daughter cleaned my side of the shop and now I cannot find anything.

Learn a knew skill? Now this one I do not know about. If learning a new skill gets the dishes done on their own without a dishwasher, I am game, as I do not like the skill of doing dishes.

Now five and six go hand in hand. Live life to its fullest and save money. Well, if I live life to its fullest, I am quite sure it is going to cost money. You see, a good barrel-racing horse is at least $10,000, so there would go my savings, as we all know horses and their upkeep are not cheap. This would be a big failure for me, as I already own a horse.

Smoking is No. 7 and I do not even put that on the list anymore. I have failed so many times on this one, I aive up, although Hubby would like it if I mastered this one.

Family time is eight. Are we talking siblings, kids and parents? My mother’s other children live far, far away, all our elderly parents are gone, and our kids just do not want to leave. We have tried, and they keep coming back. They must like my cooking.

I travel quite a bit, and this is No. 9. I travel to the gas station, and I go to the grocery store. I take my daughter to her appointments, and we see our horses, which is the most travelling I do, but if they mean to go to a sunny and warm place in the winter, I will fail. I just do not see the sense in going from -35 C, to 35 C and then back to -40 C in two weeks’ time.

Read more is last. I truly got this one. With my job I need to read and lots. I have read more in the last year than I have in the past five years. Got It.

Being mentally prepared helps. Setting a goal that can be reached is another wise move. Saying you plan to lose 50 pounds in four months is setting yourself up for failure.

I just did not make one. I do not need a new year to make goals or plans. I set them throughout the year as I know that my resolutions would be an epic failure, and who needs that kind of negativity?

I prefer to start my new year on a good note.

But then this is just my opinion.

 

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